Ralph was born and raised in Pittsburgh. He lived abroad for 10 years frequently shacking up with early to mid-twenties men which he abused both sexually and physically. He enjoys tanning at home and cheating on his spouse with any person that pays attention to him. He believes his moral opinions are of the highest and most intelligent category. He frequently works out women's fitness gyms. He has battled addiction to both pornography and alcoholism to no avail. His need for attention will aggravate even the most narcissistic teenage girls. No one takes him seriously but Ralph is normally oblivious to this fact, preferring instead to impose his superior frame of thought on anyone who will listen.